Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Incredibly discouraged
Soooo, I put new batteries in my scale today because it's been doing all sorts of zany things. I had thought perhaps it wasnt working properly and that it was reading my weight too heavy. Kevin was gone for the evening so I pulled it out into the hall and stepped on. It said 316?!?! What? I've checked it again since then and its down to 314 but STILL...I've been working out for weeks and weeks and eating good and haven't lost ANYTHING in the last 6 weeks?!?! Grrr. Well, I'll get on in the morning and hopefully the result will be better but for the moment I'm not very happy.
Monday, May 3, 2010
Yech!
The last 2 days have been crappy for weight loss. I did go work out this morning but yesterday we had the church picnic and I ate a few cookies thta Gina brought and today I think I overdid it on the yummy snacks that I got from the Bulk Price Food Shoppe, ate out at GingeRootz, and then ate leftovers and dessert when Kevin got home. Yech! I don't even feel good. Tomorrow I'm on program the whole day...even with life group!
Friday, April 30, 2010
Ouch!
So, I went to Funky Fusion today. It was miserably hot, I looked really really fat in the mirrors...and on top of it my knee was killing me so I couldn't fully participate. What a bummer!
I think I locked it up on Monday and am still recuperating. I'll need to do some research as how to prevent that or what I could do to help protect my knees.
I really like the classes at the Y. The hardest thing is that I feel very judged by the instructors and like they look down at me...but the only way that will change is through continued hard work.
That said, I've done good with eating the last 2 nights and am planning the same again today. I really want to see a difference next week on the scale!
It's beautiful outside so we are off to the park and maybe some garage sales.
I think I locked it up on Monday and am still recuperating. I'll need to do some research as how to prevent that or what I could do to help protect my knees.
I really like the classes at the Y. The hardest thing is that I feel very judged by the instructors and like they look down at me...but the only way that will change is through continued hard work.
That said, I've done good with eating the last 2 nights and am planning the same again today. I really want to see a difference next week on the scale!
It's beautiful outside so we are off to the park and maybe some garage sales.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Weekly Weigh In
So, I hopped in the scale to do my official weigh in for this blog. It was better then I expected but truthfully I just can't wait to get out of the 300's. Unfortunately I wasn't there yet.
Today's weight...
304
Today's weight...
304
"Fat Ashlee"
When you are overweight you know that is the first thing people notice about you. I can't wait until that is not people's first impression of me.
I remember a few years ago, at one of my kids birthday parties someone told me how "funny" it was that her daughter called me "fat Ashlee." Totally ruined the day and I don't think I'll ever forget it. I was embarassed in front of a houseful of people, but what could I say? I was "fat Ashlee" and who could blame the kid for categorizing me that way?
I remember a few years ago, at one of my kids birthday parties someone told me how "funny" it was that her daughter called me "fat Ashlee." Totally ruined the day and I don't think I'll ever forget it. I was embarassed in front of a houseful of people, but what could I say? I was "fat Ashlee" and who could blame the kid for categorizing me that way?
Starting Point
I've had this idea in my head about a weight loss blog for longer then I've been losing weight to be honest. I think it first came to me right before I was pregnant with our son. I knew the weight would still be there to lose after my pregnancy and for the past 6 months the idea has still been in the back of my mind.
My youngest son, Elijah was born in November and shortly afterwards I began to have crazy health problems. My liver levels were bad, I wasn't feeling good, and I even had to be rushed to the ER by ambulance! I had to stop nursing Elijah, wore heart monitors, the list goes on and on. Finally in February I ended up having my gall bladder taken out. Many of the "issues" have gotten better since then. Towards the end of January I weighed in at a whopping 325 lbs.
I know. You must be thinking, how does one get to 325 lbs? I really don't know, exactly. I sure didn't intend for it to happen. When Kevin and I got married 10 years ago I weighed right around 200 lbs. Although I could have lost a little weight, I was fairly healthy. I looked nice and could buy clothes just about anywhere. The summer before we got married I got mono and stopped running. I had been running 4 miles per day several days a week. I never really picked up anything else that I enjoyed doing. We were a very unhealthy mixture of busy, poor and stressed. Kevin and I both gained a lot of weight during the first 3 years we were married. Did you know the number one predictor of obesity is income level?
Then we started having babies. I was up to 250 when I got pregnant with Lydianna, and around 280 when she was born. I lost down to around 270 but never got the rest of the weight off. When I got pregnant with Adalee I was around 280, got up to around 305. I lost some of that weight and hovered around 290 for about a year. Then in 2006 Kevin worked around 100 miles away and we only had one vehicle. I was trapped at home and very depressed. I didn't even open the curtains most days. I hit about 310 that year. When I got pregnant with Elijah I didn't really gain any weight (Yay!) but of course after he was born the PCOS kicked in and I gained a little more bringing me to the 325 point in January.
Yes, I do have PCOS which definitely makes it hard to lose weight at this point. I don't personally know if PCOS makes it easier to gain weight or if I have PCOS because of my weight. I do know that I don't eat as much as a lot of thin people I know. I also know that life just isn't fair and I need to figure out how to lose weight for me.
For the past 8 weeks I've been exercizing regularly, mostly at the local YMCA and eating better. I've lost some weight (Weigh in will be coming shortly) but not as much as I would like. So, this next week we are changing our diet drastically. I think many days I'm working my butt off at the gym only to sabatoge myself with food.
I fully expect this to take around 2 years. But, if I don't take the 2 years now it will still take 2 years from whenever I start. I turned 30 last week and am certainly not getting any younger.
So here goes....
My youngest son, Elijah was born in November and shortly afterwards I began to have crazy health problems. My liver levels were bad, I wasn't feeling good, and I even had to be rushed to the ER by ambulance! I had to stop nursing Elijah, wore heart monitors, the list goes on and on. Finally in February I ended up having my gall bladder taken out. Many of the "issues" have gotten better since then. Towards the end of January I weighed in at a whopping 325 lbs.
I know. You must be thinking, how does one get to 325 lbs? I really don't know, exactly. I sure didn't intend for it to happen. When Kevin and I got married 10 years ago I weighed right around 200 lbs. Although I could have lost a little weight, I was fairly healthy. I looked nice and could buy clothes just about anywhere. The summer before we got married I got mono and stopped running. I had been running 4 miles per day several days a week. I never really picked up anything else that I enjoyed doing. We were a very unhealthy mixture of busy, poor and stressed. Kevin and I both gained a lot of weight during the first 3 years we were married. Did you know the number one predictor of obesity is income level?
Then we started having babies. I was up to 250 when I got pregnant with Lydianna, and around 280 when she was born. I lost down to around 270 but never got the rest of the weight off. When I got pregnant with Adalee I was around 280, got up to around 305. I lost some of that weight and hovered around 290 for about a year. Then in 2006 Kevin worked around 100 miles away and we only had one vehicle. I was trapped at home and very depressed. I didn't even open the curtains most days. I hit about 310 that year. When I got pregnant with Elijah I didn't really gain any weight (Yay!) but of course after he was born the PCOS kicked in and I gained a little more bringing me to the 325 point in January.
Yes, I do have PCOS which definitely makes it hard to lose weight at this point. I don't personally know if PCOS makes it easier to gain weight or if I have PCOS because of my weight. I do know that I don't eat as much as a lot of thin people I know. I also know that life just isn't fair and I need to figure out how to lose weight for me.
For the past 8 weeks I've been exercizing regularly, mostly at the local YMCA and eating better. I've lost some weight (Weigh in will be coming shortly) but not as much as I would like. So, this next week we are changing our diet drastically. I think many days I'm working my butt off at the gym only to sabatoge myself with food.
I fully expect this to take around 2 years. But, if I don't take the 2 years now it will still take 2 years from whenever I start. I turned 30 last week and am certainly not getting any younger.
So here goes....
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